I grew up on the 200 block of a Street. On the 300 block I had three close friends. I still have contact with two of those friends. They mean the world to me. They are a connection to my past. Their parents have been important in my life. We always spent time at each other's houses. Yesterday we lost one of the Moms. She was a great lady.
Betty was a strong Dane. She was very proud of her heritage. When her husband came home from World War II he struggled with depression. Later he was diagnosed bi-polar. Mental Illness was not something people talked about. Betty was the strength in the family. She worked full-time. Took care of her house and three kids. Her job was Activity Therapist for Severely Mentally Challenged kids. These were the kids that were so bad they could not be kept at home. Are you getting an idea of who she was? A caregiver times 100. She never complained. She loved to laugh. A great big laugh. She would find things to laugh about. She was a Christian.
Taking care of her husband had to have been a struggle. He would get depressed and not leave bed for days. He had electric shock therapy. He was in and out of hospitals. He worked as much as he was able. Betty loved him with all her heart. She never complained.
Later Betty's daughter was diagnosed bi-polar. She helped raise her grand daughter. She took care of her daughter for years. She never complained. A few years ago she knew it was time for her daughter to live away from home. She moved to assisted living. Betty did not want her to go. She knew she had to. She was strong enough to plan for when she was not here. When she needed to be tough, she did it.
She has a grand child that is bi-polar. I never heard her ask, why? She gave me books about mental illness. She talked about the challenges of the mentally ill. She always reminded people that her daughter had a mental illness but she also had a high intelligence. She did not want people to forget. She did not complain.
Betty went into the hospital the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. She had not been feeling good for a couple of weeks. They discovered she had Stage 4 Cancer. It was everywhere. They could only make her comfortable. She must have been in terrible pain for quite a while. She made it back to her hometown to die. She wanted to be in her home. That was not possible. At least she was in her town.
Let me try to describe how connected our families are. We grew up on the same street. We went to the same church. Our parents knew each other. My friend was one year a head of me in school. She was in Hubby's class. Hubby lived one block from her. Betty and Hubby's Mom worked at the same place. Betty was a Honorary Pallbearer at Hubby's Mom's funeral. One of Hubby's sisters is best friends with my friend's older sister. Connected. Same roots.
A great lady entered Heaven yesterday. Now she can spend time with her husband while he is healthy. She will be with all her siblings. I am glad she went quickly. She had already suffered enough. I will miss her. Her family will be lost without her. I know I am a better person for having known her.
Of those of us that grew up together on that street. Only one has living parents. She had the young parents! They are both still living. What a blessing for her.
It will be a tough visitation and funeral to attend. It is hard for me to see someone lose their parent. Reminds me of all the pain and depression I went through. Losing my parents and Hubby's parents. It has made me more aware of what a struggle people have without their Moms. I hope I can give my friend comfort. She will be lost without that strong Dane around. Many people will!
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